Lumberg!

I figure that all lives have a moral. Even if you're not a person where one day you realize that everything you've done in life is leading you to one event, one momentous cataclysm that will define you and perhaps more, there still is a moral.

I was thinking that the moral of my life so far, both in stories that turn out well, and stories that don't turn out well, is seize every opportunity that comes your way. Every time I've done it I've been rewarded, and every time I've let it pass me by I've regretted it. So go for it!

Of course, the real trick is being able to tell opportunities apart from deceptions, isn't it?

So I was in town today putting the NEFARIUS plates on Rachel's Toureg (if you're wondering where the O went, I used it on my face… j/k, there's an eight letter limit) and at the license bureau I was approached by a friendly looking portly woman with a big smile.

“Shannon Larratt?!?”

Uh…. Yeah….?

“It's Anne XXXX! From highschool?”

I'm sorry, I really have no idea who you are. I have a memory disorder and really can't remember anything from highschool, let alone yesterday.

“I married your brother…”

It's news to me, sorry. I really can't remember things like that. I really don't have any memory of highschool.

“Well, it's probably for the best.”

She figured out pretty quickly that I had zero interest in talking to her or being helped to remember who she was and wandered off. Anyway, on to why my satellite cut out. We'd actually cancelled the service a bit over a month ago (to end October 1st), but since we're back for a while, I'd called a week or two ago to “cancel the cancel”… but today it cut out, so I called customer service to find out what was up.

“You asked for it to be cancelled on August 28th, so I'm not sure what you're complaining about.”

Yeah, but I also called in to uncancel it.

“You can't call about things like that. You have to email. Unless you sent an email or a fax it doesn't uncancel it. It doesn't count if you phoned it in.”

No one told me that when I called in. Check the notes on my customer record and tell me what it says please. I was assured everything was fine and no one mentioned this “must email” deal.

“It says 'customer called on September 20th to request cancellation be cancelled and service be continued'. But I don't see anything about an email.”

So why did you cancel my service then? I mean, wouldn't that at least warrant that you call me and confirm before cancelling?

“Well, on August 28th you asked for it to be cancelled. What did you think would happen?”

(this repeats a few times)

OK, look, what do I have to do to get this thing working again?

“Will you be paying the re-connect fees by VISA or Mastercard?”

Nice.

Wow Shannon, that's really annoying! What is it, 1997 on Geocities? Retroweb is NOT cool!

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