The end times are craaaaaaaaazy!

I'm sure you know about Punctuated Equilibrium, right? Basically if you look at the fossil record, nothing much changes for a really long time, but then — bang! bang! bang! — all of a sudden you've got a whole bunch species being upgraded to the next level on the evolutionary ladder (ie. genetic changes resulting in tons of new species — some successful, some failures).

Moving on, over the last few years our magnetic poles have been “faltering”, moving randomly and weakening — these are the symptoms that we're right on the edge of a pole flip… Now, this doesn't happen instantly. It's a thousand year process or something. During that period the Earth has dramatically less protection from the harsher elements of the sun's rays. The first thing that results in is all our satellites dying — a giant pain in the ass, given how much communication (and navigation) is satellite based these days.

The second factor is more disturbing — and more exciting. When these rays start hitting us, punctuated equilibrium moves into the “punctuated” phase. Or, to put it into one simple word:

MUTANTS

Yeah, you think I'm making this stuff up, but you can check the facts (more) for yourself. This modern apocalypse that I've been describing even comes with mutants (call them zombies for the film adaptation of the future if you want). Remember, you have to shoot them in the head.

PS. While everything above actually is basically true, this entry is mostly about me really, really, really looking forward to Dawn of the Dead.

Wow Shannon, that's really annoying! What is it, 1997 on Geocities? Retroweb is NOT cool!

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