Monthly Archives: July 2006

1997: Lug Hole, 2006: Ear Guy

Oh, how far we've come in ten years.

It's crazy — BME turns twelve later this year and then enters its thirteenth year. I'd wager at this point that for a significant percentage of BME readers, BME has existed for all of their lives (say you start browsing the internet at age six, then if you're 18 or younger, BME existed when you first got onto the Internet). I wonder what person I'd have turned out to be if I'd had access to similar resources (the only hands-on information I had was from books on how the Masaii did their ear cutting).

I really miss the days when modification was still a mystery, and we were still figuring out what would work and what wouldn't, and every few weeks we'd see something new come out of the shadows… It feels much more stable and defined these days, which is strange and not quite right. Body modification should be a little wild, and a little “off”. It's part of what makes it fun I think.

Perhaps the “need for exploration” is why I want to replace this removed uvula piercing with a pair of soft palette piercings (ie. up through the soft part of the roof of the mouth — just have to figure out the logistics). Well, today I think I have to do a nice big BME/video update!

The flame that burns twice as bright

I watched Waking Life today. I found it deeply upsetting and probably won't watch it again. I thought it was good though. As people who've read this diary know, since an overdose about fifteen years ago I haven't been able to shake the feeling that everything that I am experiencing is going on in that last moment as I'm overdosing. As time goes by, and I lose more and more of my memory, it becomes even more upsetting and “real”. I can compensate for the growing holes because I'm a pretty bright guy, but I do wonder sometimes if I'll eventually hit a threshold where I'm no longer able to meaningfully understand or communicate with the outside world.

Seriously though, I wish I could explain what it's like to live without memory and without a sense of time — for example, as I'll note later in the entry, I cut my facial hair off today and wrote a brief paragraph about the winter weather. Yeah, I know it's not winter. But I only know because I can look out my window. If I didn't look out my window, I'd have no idea what time of year it is let alone where I am (although I'm sure I could eventually deduce it by slowly trying to unravel recent events). Well, anyway, like I said, I cut it off again, but it keeps growing back.

But I wonder… am I changing as a person as I lose bits of myself, or does it make me more pure, or is it just a thick layer of mud that somehow I can't see and can't shake? Sometimes I think to myself that all I need in life is for someone to tell me that I'm real, hold on to me, and somehow, suddenly, reality will feel real again and I'll wake up and feel a crispness in life, like the way the air feels different on a cold, windless day over fresh snow… But I doubt it's that simple.

I'm going to try and make it an early night tonight. I can't get myself — no matter how tired I am or how many sleeping pills I take — to sleep a full night. I think the most sleep I've gotten this year is about five hours at a time, and I'm fairly certain that I'm getting less as time goes by. I think maybe if I knock myself out early, even if I wake up at four or five in the morning as the sun rises I'll get a little more sleep… I just hope I don't wake up at 2AM and then can't get back to sleep.

A quick cut

I borrowed Jon's camera to take a couple pictures of myself cutting out my uvula piercing. It had almost rejected, but there was still enough tissue that it couldn't be torn out. Since I didn't want to swallow (or aspirate) it in my sleep, I used a pair of mosquito forceps and a kitchen knife to do a little home surgery. A quick bit of pain (really minor) and it was out. Mind the plaque. I knew I was cutting it out so I didn't stress brushing the jewelry.

Oh yeah, don't try this at home.

And if you do, don't be kitchen-knife-oldschool about it unless you are kitchen-knife-oldschool in age.

Besides that, I've got my development environment totally running on the new internal test server and am starting to process huge amounts of data (mostly trying to auto-generate keywords and locations and so on to try and seed a dataset with something more useful).

Anyway, back to that. I'm keeping fairly strict work hours right now.

Not much to post today…

Spent today cleaning up the office with Phil's help, and installed Server 2003 on this jet fighter (because it's fans are so damn loud we're going to need noise cancelling headphones to work) of a developmemt server. It's working now on our internal network serving files, so tomorrow the work begins. I have a little fun project I'm going to tackle first, then the big one!

Other than that, I keep seeing things on TV that I want to share either here or on ModBlog so I finally got around to installing the capture device I picked up about a month ago, only to discover that the sticker with the serial number is not in the package! So the software won't install! Now I have to send Pinnacle a picture of me holding the physical product or something, but I've misplaced my camera! Arrrgh!

Updates and Fours

 

I decided to post today and tomorrow's update together right now (ie. early). Thank you to everyone who helped out with pictures and Joao_Caldara for the cover shot of his work. Also, I hope that by posting this publicly, people will stop forwarding it to me (I don't mean that in a complainy way!!!). I think it's about time I answered, given how many times I've received it (hope that's not bad luck).

Four Things About Me
Four things you may or may not have known about me, in categories in no particular order.

Four jobs I have had in my life:

  1. Ball Diamond Liner
  2. Jeweller
  3. Programmer
  4. Farmhand

Four movies I have watched over and over:

  1. Top Gun
  2. The Breakfast Club
  3. Ferris Bueller's Day Off

    (Laugh it up, it's just because I spent a long time with a TV by my computer and I watched the movies on TBS).

  4. Dawn of the Dead

Four places I have lived:

  1. Philadelphia, PA
  2. Miramichi, NB
  3. Victoria, BC
  4. Big Island (Demorestville), ON

Four TV shows I love to watch:

  1. Survivor
  2. Kenny Vs Spenny
  3. Daily Show / Colbert Report
  4. Ali G

Four places I have been on vacation:

  1. Namibia
  2. Argentina
  3. Germany
  4. Jamaica

Four websites I visit daily

  1. ModBlog
  2. IAM
  3. Sorry, I really am that boring and/or busy!

Four of my favourite foods:

  1. Sushi
  2. Beer
  3. Martinis
  4. Water

Four places I would rather be right now:

  1. In orbit
  2. Mars station
  3. A lush alien planet
  4. On a sailboat

Four friends I think will respond to this forward:

OK, I'm breaking the rules here. Normally you'd list four people here and the instructions continue:

Now, here's what you're supposed to do… and please do not spoil the fun. Hit forward, delete my name and type in your answers. Then send this to a whole bunch of people you know INCLUDING the person who sent it to you. The theory is that you will learn a lot of little known facts about those who know you. Remember to send it back to the person who sent it to you (or “censor” the suggestion of a previous interviewee).

To keep it interesting, I propose the following:

In addition, please create a new category (type), and remove one of the existing ones. That is, remove one of the list questions with one of your own. This keeps the list changing, and lets people take a “pass” on questions they can't easily answer.

Here's my new list:

Four skills you have that people might be surprised about:
  1. Excellent goat milker
  2. Very good at Vulcan (as in Star Trek) hand gesture tricks
  3. Can do complete-length movie karoake of Heathers
  4. Pretty good at braiding hair

Feel free to use that idea or not. But I hope I'm not spoiling the fun. I'm posting this about me here, and I hope that maybe people will reply to me with their answers or post them (I really do enjoy reading them even if I don't have time to reply). And don't forget to send your list to other friends!

No More Plants.

We've all been debating “what if there's not enough oil for all of us forever”, and are slowly growing the courage to debate whether we're running out of fresh, uncontaminated water, we're debating global warming, pollution, and a dozen other apocalyptic fears… But I think what it boils down to is us running out of food.

Last year, Russia exported 14 million tons of grain. This year, they anticipate being able to export only 7 million tons. Canada, America, and other major agricultural nations are in a similar position. To make matters worse, not only is production way down for a variety of reasons, but we currently have grain reserves on the planet of less than two months — ie. peak grain. If the same spike happens that we saw in 1973 (which also helped lead to lasting political problems in Africa and Asia), the only other time reserves dropped this low, grain could rise to well over $20 a bushel. To put that into context, it raises the price of a box of breakfast cereal for $5 to over $30*. Similar price increases could happen with anything that uses grain in its production — breads, dairy products, meat, eggs, almost everything. And that says nothing about the fact that in 1973, we weren't dedicating valuable swaths of land to wasteful projects like biofuels. How will your life change if food prices increase five to ten times what they are now?

* Since it's been pointed out by a few people, let me add that I'm aware that a $1 wholesale breakfast cereal is not the same thing as $1 wholesale of raw grain, and in fact it's only a small percentage of the price. But if you don't think you that the price will rise with the price of its most costly ingredient rather than the average, then you're not just kidding yourself, but you're ignoring lessons learned over the last five year's energy prices.

Seriously, when coupled with warming issues, peak oil, and peak water (not enough fresh drinking water), peak grain and peak food — the inability to produce and distribute enough food to everyone to survive — is our real problem. It's not just global warming combined with a few weird winters and summers that's leaving us with a reduced harvest — it's that even in the regions where we can produce the food (America, Canada, northern Europe, and many other areas can output tons of food), we're using a ton of oil in large equipment to produce the crops, we're using aggressive and destructive irrigation techniques, and worst of all, the point of production is very far away from the point of consumption, additionally escalating the price due to shipping costs.

So in short, if we have a bad summer for crops — and that's what most predictions are saying — pricing on nearly everything (even things you might not have considered like organic plastics). The problem gets even worse though. Because both to compensate for the need for more active farmland and during urban sprawl, we're also killing off “natural farmland”, which as I've mentioned before has the secondary result of leading us toward the extinction of bees. It seems like such a little thing, but when you have mass extinctions of insects like we're starting to experience now, the end result is a significant drop in pollination, and yet another massive reduction in the plant life on the surface of the earth.

What's most amazing to me is that as far as I can tell no one is doing anything about it even though it's obvious (hello rolling blackouts across the USA), but I finally realized why — because nothing short of truly exotic technology (zero-point power generation type stuff) or something that's ultimately risky (nuclear) can save our extravagent lifestyles. Biofuels are laughable, and can't even produce 1% of our current fuel needs, and as I've mentioned above, we don't have the grain/corn/soy/etc. to spare anywhere. Wind and solar? Yeah, lets spend billions of dollars to produce millions of dollars worth of energy. The truth that no one seems to get even though it's been said over and over is that we are simply consuming more than is available to us globally, let alone available to us locally.

Did I mention I've been thinking about a Northern property that I could have a big garden on, big enough to root cellar everything I need for the winter, forests and fields to forage for tea, mustard, berries, fruits, and other delicacies, a year-round spring for fresh water, and bear, moose, deer, and small game on the property that I'm perfectly willing to shoot an arrow through and eat if I have to? Hope I can get out of the city before the maurading rape-gangs looking for food and unwilling orifices get me.